The Best Budget Message of The President

To the Republican Congress (not them SAD democrats) of the United States:

As I look back on these grate months as the best PRESIDENT, I am so happy by America’s being Made Great Again #MAGA! I am moving us forword. When I swore on that bible and assumed command of America #MAGA!, my nation was a mess. Obama was SAD! America was SAD!

Thanks to me and my bigly hands, and them grate American Trump voters #MAGA!, I rescued us! Best rescue you have ever seen! I have kicked fureigners out! I have made Boeing and other companies sign new deals! Today, my economy, America’s #MAGA economy is awesome.

I have created a bunch of jobs already! Just months in the job as supereme President I have #MAGA! Employment? Gone! Illegal workers stealing American #MAGA! jobs? On there way out! Ihave made the American #MAGA economy the envy of the world.

Even though I did this, their is work to do. The #MAGA Budget is not about looking back (WRONG!). The #MAGA Budget is about me taking us forword! The #MAGA Budget is about the bigly questions that defines the #MAGA America!

My Budget makes huge investments, needed huge investments, while sticking to the Republican budget agreement. Those sad democrats are the reason we had to have a budget agreement because they were giving all my money to kids, and blacks, and illegals with fake sociol secruity numbers! Big mistake! Sad!

First, America #MAGA is going to inovate in hotels, especially them big tower like hotels with gold plated toilets and thrones. Sorta like them hotels I own (but in a trust so I am seeing none of that moneys). Next I am gonna invest in http://www.bibleastextbook.com because the best Educaton Secertary, Betsy DeVos, is gonna make sure bibles is what kids will learn from.

I am also budgeting for an increase in Homeland Secuirty because that is how we keep them dirty jihady Muslims out, and how we kick all them greasy Mexicans out. I will make sure we have enough Immigration and Customs Enforcement stormtroopers that we can stop them at the WALL (#MAGA!) and root them out of there nests in California, Taxachussetts, and New Englandistan.

I am making budget for jobs. All sorts of grate jobs. Jobs at malls. Jobs at hospitals. Jobs at toll booths (because roads don’t pay for themselves!).

What am I not budgeting for? The environment, gays, poor people, educaton, SAD studies about global warming (hey it was cold last week here in DC! Way cold!), and anything that helps democrat voters (there are only 12 of them who voted millions of times, Bannon and Briebart told me that).

Finally, I am spending a gazillion $s on big military things! #MAGA Big planes, big tanks, small planes, small tanks, a bunch of aircraft carriers for those big and small planes. I am going to hire millions of young men and women who can’t find jobs AND then I am going to budget for a big war with Iran or Koreas or anyone other than Russia. To save money I am going to make Canada pay for all of there defences.

It won’t be easy. But with your taxes (not rich people’s taxes though, just your taxes) and me taking the credit for it, we can #MAGA. I am the best president and this is the best budget. Any budget presented before this budget pales in compareson. I will move us forword to invent stuff, to grow larger our opportunties and secruities, and MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN! #MAGA

Donald J. Trump @realdonaldtrump, @45POTUS

The White House (not to be confused with the Winter White House in Florida)

March 1, 2017

#MAGA